Just random ramblings
16 years ago
Monday, March 31, 2008
im sorry..
Sorry..very sorry to you all..
especially to Ying Han, Su Qin and Ann Ying..
Actually im not angry or want scold anyone of you..maybe you still dont understand me yet..or maybe i thinking too much. I feel that i make some of you feel offended. very sorry. I really dont meant it. I just say out what i think is right..and when im serious i look fierce and my voice also will become louder. But actually i really not angry or scolding. I just serious with what i want to say and i feel what im saying is correct. very sorry. I feel guilty now. But this is me, i know i cant change this bad habits but i'll control myself. I promise~!
I think since secondary school, im already like that. Peoples will say me ego..because when im doing works,i dont bother anything that happen around me. Even if there is someone trying to talk to me or ask me question, i will give him/her a bad impression. I will reply him/her coldly..sorry! I just cant help it..when i doing works,i need concentration thus most of the time i wont talk to anyone. Sometimes i heard what they say..i heard they call me..but i ignore them. Just because i want to concentrate on what i am doing.
Even SuQin also ask me 'dont angry lar'..i feel sad,i thought she understand me enough.
But she dont know at that time i was angry or serious. Serious and Angry is two different emotion,right?haih.
Really sorry. really feel like crying now. my tears all terkumpul in my eyes d.
sorry..i hope i can control myself and be kind to everyone even i am busy with my works. I can be very crazy and laugh liek a mad girl when playing or enjoy celebrate something..but sorry,i will look very fierce when i am study or doing works. Even to my roommates also im like that, that's why i am not close to them. I dont like people to disturb me. SO next time if you see me look very fierce and sound like scolding, please understand that i am not meant to do that. I think i never scold any of my friends before. I just scold my siblings only...i really never scold any of my friends..or even my ex boyfriend..i wont scold them yet i know im right and they are wrong. What i will do is just hiding myself and cry. im feel so hopeless now..........i want go back home.......
sorry again..
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3 comments:
haha... my new form 6 classmates, especially girls, are also like that. when i asked them things when they are doing homework, i was like talking alone only. then, i will say loudly "haih... since small i eat glass and grow... so i'm transparent now". then when they ask me things especially about class stuff (i'm the pengerusi kelas) or during muet, they ask me to about english or translate things to them, or translate maths terms, i just respond very slowly, or give wrong info. very bad huh? hahaha... but it's fun to do that back to them. ahakz~ and they don't realise. guess that's the evil side of me lolx~
I understand what you mean here.. but still.. I really don’t think that you are doing anything wrong.. you are just being yourself.. take me for instant.. I went through almost the same thing few years back.. most of my classmates don’t dare to talk me when I am doing something.. like writing, reading, daydreaming.. because when doing all this I don’t talk.. I don’t care anything or anyone else.. and I don’t smile.. so I look very serious to some people.. some might think I am in anger or being mad at something.. the truth is I am just concentrate in what I do at that particular moment.. they even describe me as a “time bomb” in our yearly class magazine.. what the.. anyway.. what I am trying to point out is.. your friends might not in the position to really know and understand what you are feeling at that moment.. you said that serious and angry are two different emotion.. totally agree with that.. but how about the face expression.. we might show the same expression when we are serious and being angry.. you know exactly when you are angry and when you are being serious.. but your friends and even the closest ones will confuse will your expression at times.. so maybe with little effort.. like when you want to concentrate in your study.. and your friends ask you something or talk to you.. just nicely stress out that you want to focus on your study.. and can chat with them later.. then they will know what to do.. it will at least reduce all the misunderstanding..
hwen. i understand you. Last time u use to be like that to me too..But i wanna tell you that i don't mind. Don't think so much. I think maybe i biasa with you already. SO, when i see u serious, pandai-pandai lar sendiri. hehe.. anyway, april now! Jia you for ur final! GOD bless you!!
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